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第三节 书面表达(共15分)
你校将举办一次以“立楷模、学楷模”为主题的活动。学校英文报以“My Role Model”为题向学生征稿。请根据以下思维导图的内容提示写一篇短文投稿，介绍你心目中的楷模及他/她优秀的品质。
注意：
1. 可在思维导图内容提示的基础上适当拓展信息；
2. 80个词左右(短文的开头已给出，不计入词数)；
3. 不得透露学校、姓名等任何个人信息，否则不予评分。
My Role Model
I have a role model.
你校将举办一次以“立楷模、学楷模”为主题的活动。学校英文报以“My Role Model”为题向学生征稿。请根据以下思维导图的内容提示写一篇短文投稿，介绍你心目中的楷模及他/她优秀的品质。
注意：
1. 可在思维导图内容提示的基础上适当拓展信息；
2. 80个词左右(短文的开头已给出，不计入词数)；
3. 不得透露学校、姓名等任何个人信息，否则不予评分。
My Role Model
I have a role model.
He is Uncle Wang, the community doctor who's well-respected by everyone.
He is good at treating common illnesses and always devotes himself to caring for neighbours, especially the elderly living alone. Even on rainy or snowy days, he works tirelessly to make home visits, never complaining. His kindness and responsibility deeply touch me.
He once said, "Helping others makes life meaningful." His selfless deeds inspire me greatly.
I'm proud of his spirit and eager to learn from him, trying my best to help those in need and become a responsible person.
He is good at treating common illnesses and always devotes himself to caring for neighbours, especially the elderly living alone. Even on rainy or snowy days, he works tirelessly to make home visits, never complaining. His kindness and responsibility deeply touch me.
He once said, "Helping others makes life meaningful." His selfless deeds inspire me greatly.
I'm proud of his spirit and eager to learn from him, trying my best to help those in need and become a responsible person.
答案
My Role Model
I have a role model. He is Uncle Wang, the community doctor who's well-respected by
everyone.
He is good at treating common illnesses and always devotes himself to caring for neighbours,
especially the elderly living alone. Even on rainy or snowy days, he works tirelessly to make home
visits, never complaining. His kindness and responsibility deeply touch me.
He once said, "Helping others makes life meaningful." His selfless deeds inspire me greatly.
I'm proud of his spirit and eager to learn from him, trying my best to help those in need and
become a responsible person.
I have a role model. He is Uncle Wang, the community doctor who's well-respected by
everyone.
He is good at treating common illnesses and always devotes himself to caring for neighbours,
especially the elderly living alone. Even on rainy or snowy days, he works tirelessly to make home
visits, never complaining. His kindness and responsibility deeply touch me.
He once said, "Helping others makes life meaningful." His selfless deeds inspire me greatly.
I'm proud of his spirit and eager to learn from him, trying my best to help those in need and
become a responsible person.
解析
【分析】
拿到这道题首先要明确写作的三个核心要求，完全对应思维导图的三个问题：第一，先确定你的榜样是谁，以及你和他/她的关联，也就是你认识他/她的途径，选择身边熟悉的普通人作为写作对象，比选择知名名人更容易写出真情实感，也不容易出现内容空洞的问题；第二，要明确写出你最欣赏他/她的品质，最好搭配一个简短的具体小事例做支撑，避免空泛表述；第三，要清晰说明这些品质是如何激励你的，写出你想要向榜样学习的具体方向。同时要注意控制总词数在80左右，不能透露任何个人隐私信息，行文衔接自然流畅。
【解析】
我们可以按照清晰的三步结构完成写作：
1. 承接题目给出的开头，直接点明榜样的身份，交代你认识他的背景：说明他是社区里广受大家尊敬的王医生，日常就在小区为邻居们提供医疗服务，所有人都对他十分熟悉。
2. 中间主体部分介绍你最欣赏的品质：点明他擅长处理常见病症，始终全心全意为邻居服务，哪怕雨雪天气也会不辞辛劳上门为独居老人问诊，从不抱怨，他的善良和极强的责任心是最打动你的特质。
3. 结尾部分写榜样对你的激励：他的言行让你明白帮助他人能让生命更有意义，你也决心向他学习，尽力帮助有需要的人，成长为一个有责任感的人。
【答案】
My Role Model
I have a role model. He is Uncle Wang, the community doctor who's well-respected by everyone.
He is good at treating common illnesses and always devotes himself to caring for neighbours, especially the elderly living alone. Even on rainy or snowy days, he works tirelessly to make home visits, never complaining. His kindness and responsibility deeply touch me.
He once said, "Helping others makes life meaningful." His selfless deeds inspire me greatly. I'm proud of his spirit and eager to learn from him, trying my best to help those in need and become a responsible person.
【知识点】
提纲类作文写作，人物话题表达，常用短语运用
【点评】
这篇范文选取身边的普通社区医务工作者作为榜样，选材新颖不落俗套，完整覆盖了思维导图给出的全部三个写作要点，搭配具体的生活细节让内容真实可感，情感真挚自然，词数完全符合题目要求，没有涉及任何个人隐私信息，同时灵活运用了devote oneself to、make home visits等高分表达，行文流畅逻辑清晰，是一篇符合要求的优秀范文。
【难度系数】
0.6
拿到这道题首先要明确写作的三个核心要求，完全对应思维导图的三个问题：第一，先确定你的榜样是谁，以及你和他/她的关联，也就是你认识他/她的途径，选择身边熟悉的普通人作为写作对象，比选择知名名人更容易写出真情实感，也不容易出现内容空洞的问题；第二，要明确写出你最欣赏他/她的品质，最好搭配一个简短的具体小事例做支撑，避免空泛表述；第三，要清晰说明这些品质是如何激励你的，写出你想要向榜样学习的具体方向。同时要注意控制总词数在80左右，不能透露任何个人隐私信息，行文衔接自然流畅。
【解析】
我们可以按照清晰的三步结构完成写作：
1. 承接题目给出的开头，直接点明榜样的身份，交代你认识他的背景：说明他是社区里广受大家尊敬的王医生，日常就在小区为邻居们提供医疗服务，所有人都对他十分熟悉。
2. 中间主体部分介绍你最欣赏的品质：点明他擅长处理常见病症，始终全心全意为邻居服务，哪怕雨雪天气也会不辞辛劳上门为独居老人问诊，从不抱怨，他的善良和极强的责任心是最打动你的特质。
3. 结尾部分写榜样对你的激励：他的言行让你明白帮助他人能让生命更有意义，你也决心向他学习，尽力帮助有需要的人，成长为一个有责任感的人。
【答案】
My Role Model
I have a role model. He is Uncle Wang, the community doctor who's well-respected by everyone.
He is good at treating common illnesses and always devotes himself to caring for neighbours, especially the elderly living alone. Even on rainy or snowy days, he works tirelessly to make home visits, never complaining. His kindness and responsibility deeply touch me.
He once said, "Helping others makes life meaningful." His selfless deeds inspire me greatly. I'm proud of his spirit and eager to learn from him, trying my best to help those in need and become a responsible person.
【知识点】
提纲类作文写作，人物话题表达，常用短语运用
【点评】
这篇范文选取身边的普通社区医务工作者作为榜样，选材新颖不落俗套，完整覆盖了思维导图给出的全部三个写作要点，搭配具体的生活细节让内容真实可感，情感真挚自然，词数完全符合题目要求，没有涉及任何个人隐私信息，同时灵活运用了devote oneself to、make home visits等高分表达，行文流畅逻辑清晰，是一篇符合要求的优秀范文。
【难度系数】
0.6
