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六、书面表达。
初中三年来，你一定有最想感谢的人。某校英语报社正在举行“The person I want to thank most”的征文活动，请根据下列内容提示，写一篇英语短文参加投稿，谈谈你最想感谢谁，你们之间有过什么经历或故事，他/她带给你什么影响？
【内容提示】
1. What's he/she like?
2. What's the experience?
3. What do you learn from him/her?
【要求】
1. 短文应包括提示中所有的要点，条理清楚，行文连贯，可适当发挥。
2. 短文中不能出现真实的人名和校名。
3. 词数：80—120，开头已给出，但不计入总词数。
The person I want to thank most
Looking back at these past three years, many people have helped me.
初中三年来，你一定有最想感谢的人。某校英语报社正在举行“The person I want to thank most”的征文活动，请根据下列内容提示，写一篇英语短文参加投稿，谈谈你最想感谢谁，你们之间有过什么经历或故事，他/她带给你什么影响？
【内容提示】
1. What's he/she like?
2. What's the experience?
3. What do you learn from him/her?
【要求】
1. 短文应包括提示中所有的要点，条理清楚，行文连贯，可适当发挥。
2. 短文中不能出现真实的人名和校名。
3. 词数：80—120，开头已给出，但不计入总词数。
The person I want to thank most
Looking back at these past three years, many people have helped me.
The person I want to thank most is my father. He is a tall man with a pair of glasses. Everyone says he is a kind-hearted man. He often helps his neighbours and some strangers whom he doesn't know at all. Besides, my father is the person who knows me best.
On special days like my birthday, my father always gives me a surprise. He knows exactly what I like. Besides, whenever I meet difficulties or feel depressed in my study, my father will immediately read my thoughts, tell me the right way to do things, and tell me to face it bravely.
All in all, my father has a great influence on me. He has helped me get through those hard times and will surely lead me to a bright future.
答案
One possible version
The person I want to thank most
Looking back at these past three years, many people have helped me. The person I want to thank most is my father. He is a tall man with a pair of glasses. Everyone says he is a kind-hearted man. He often helps his neighbours and some strangers whom he doesn't know at all. Besides, my father is the person who knows me best.
On special days like my birthday, my father always gives me a surprise. He knows exactly what I like. Besides, whenever I meet difficulties or feel depressed in my study, my father will immediately read my thoughts, tell me the right way to do things, and tell me to face it bravely.
All in all, my father has a great influence on me. He has helped me get through those hard times and will surely lead me to a bright future.
The person I want to thank most
Looking back at these past three years, many people have helped me. The person I want to thank most is my father. He is a tall man with a pair of glasses. Everyone says he is a kind-hearted man. He often helps his neighbours and some strangers whom he doesn't know at all. Besides, my father is the person who knows me best.
On special days like my birthday, my father always gives me a surprise. He knows exactly what I like. Besides, whenever I meet difficulties or feel depressed in my study, my father will immediately read my thoughts, tell me the right way to do things, and tell me to face it bravely.
All in all, my father has a great influence on me. He has helped me get through those hard times and will surely lead me to a bright future.
解析
【分析】
拿到这道写作题，首先要明确核心主题是“最想感谢的人”，优先把题干给出的三个提示要点作为写作的三层框架，避免漏点：第一步先承接已给出的开头，直接点明你要感谢的对象，紧接着描述对方的外貌、性格特质，对应第一个问题“What's he/she like”；第二步选取1-2件贴合初中生活的真实感强的小事作为叙事内容，比如学习受挫时对方的开导、生活里对方的暖心帮助，把事件的前因后果梳理清楚，对应第二个问题“What's the experience”；第三步收尾总结，点明你从对方身上学到的品质、对方给你带来的长远影响，对应第三个问题“What do you learn from him/her”。写作时注意区分时态：介绍人物常态用一般现在时，描述过往经历用一般过去时，同时控制词数在80-120区间，不要出现真实人名校名，用少量衔接词让行文更流畅。
【解析】
1. 开篇点题：承接给定开头，直接点明最想感谢的人是父亲，紧接着介绍他的外形特征和善良热心的性格，完成第一个要点的表述。
2. 叙事部分：选取生日准备惊喜、学习受挫时开导自己两个贴近日常的经历，把细节写得有真情实感，清晰交代事件过程，完成第二个要点的表述。
3. 收尾升华：总结父亲对自己的深远影响，点明对方帮自己度过难关、指引自己成长，清晰写出自己从对方身上收获的成长，完成第三个要点的表述。
4. 最后核查：确认所有要点都覆盖，没有出现真实隐私信息，词数符合要求，语句衔接自然。
【答案】
One possible version
The person I want to thank most
Looking back at these past three years, many people have helped me. The person I want to thank most is my father. He is a tall man with a pair of glasses. Everyone says he is a kind-hearted man. He often helps his neighbours and some strangers whom he doesn't know at all. Besides, my father is the person who knows me best.
On special days like my birthday, my father always gives me a surprise. He knows exactly what I like. Besides, whenever I meet difficulties or feel depressed in my study, my father will immediately read my thoughts, tell me the right way to do things, and tell me to face it bravely.
All in all, my father has a great influence on me. He has helped me get through those hard times and will surely lead me to a bright future.
【知识点】
英语征文写作
人物特征描述
叙事时态运用
【点评】
这篇范文完整覆盖了题干所有提示要点，逻辑层次清晰，从介绍人物到叙事再到谈影响过渡自然，选取的日常经历很有代入感，真情实感充足，词数符合要求，也没有出现违规的真实隐私信息，还适当运用了定语从句提升表达亮点，完全符合初中英语写作的评分标准。学生写作时也可以选择感谢老师、同学等其他对象，结合自己的真实经历创作会更有感染力。
【难度系数】
0.6
拿到这道写作题，首先要明确核心主题是“最想感谢的人”，优先把题干给出的三个提示要点作为写作的三层框架，避免漏点：第一步先承接已给出的开头，直接点明你要感谢的对象，紧接着描述对方的外貌、性格特质，对应第一个问题“What's he/she like”；第二步选取1-2件贴合初中生活的真实感强的小事作为叙事内容，比如学习受挫时对方的开导、生活里对方的暖心帮助，把事件的前因后果梳理清楚，对应第二个问题“What's the experience”；第三步收尾总结，点明你从对方身上学到的品质、对方给你带来的长远影响，对应第三个问题“What do you learn from him/her”。写作时注意区分时态：介绍人物常态用一般现在时，描述过往经历用一般过去时，同时控制词数在80-120区间，不要出现真实人名校名，用少量衔接词让行文更流畅。
【解析】
1. 开篇点题：承接给定开头，直接点明最想感谢的人是父亲，紧接着介绍他的外形特征和善良热心的性格，完成第一个要点的表述。
2. 叙事部分：选取生日准备惊喜、学习受挫时开导自己两个贴近日常的经历，把细节写得有真情实感，清晰交代事件过程，完成第二个要点的表述。
3. 收尾升华：总结父亲对自己的深远影响，点明对方帮自己度过难关、指引自己成长，清晰写出自己从对方身上收获的成长，完成第三个要点的表述。
4. 最后核查：确认所有要点都覆盖，没有出现真实隐私信息，词数符合要求，语句衔接自然。
【答案】
One possible version
The person I want to thank most
Looking back at these past three years, many people have helped me. The person I want to thank most is my father. He is a tall man with a pair of glasses. Everyone says he is a kind-hearted man. He often helps his neighbours and some strangers whom he doesn't know at all. Besides, my father is the person who knows me best.
On special days like my birthday, my father always gives me a surprise. He knows exactly what I like. Besides, whenever I meet difficulties or feel depressed in my study, my father will immediately read my thoughts, tell me the right way to do things, and tell me to face it bravely.
All in all, my father has a great influence on me. He has helped me get through those hard times and will surely lead me to a bright future.
【知识点】
英语征文写作
人物特征描述
叙事时态运用
【点评】
这篇范文完整覆盖了题干所有提示要点，逻辑层次清晰，从介绍人物到叙事再到谈影响过渡自然，选取的日常经历很有代入感，真情实感充足，词数符合要求，也没有出现违规的真实隐私信息，还适当运用了定语从句提升表达亮点，完全符合初中英语写作的评分标准。学生写作时也可以选择感谢老师、同学等其他对象，结合自己的真实经历创作会更有感染力。
【难度系数】
0.6
