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七、书面表达
在过去一年的学习、生活中,你肯定参加过一些户外活动,像学
校旅行或露营等。你们班将开展以"An amazing outdoor activity"为
题的英语作文活动,并在班级内展示。请根据以下要求完成一篇文
章。要点如下：
注意:(1) 词数不少于80,开头已给出,不计入总词数;
(2) 内容必须包括思维导图中的要点,可以适当发挥,以使
短文完整、流畅；
(3) 文中不得提及真实的人名、校名等相关信息。
An amazing outdoor activity
Time flies by quickly. In the past year, I took part in many
amazing outdoor activities.
在过去一年的学习、生活中,你肯定参加过一些户外活动,像学
校旅行或露营等。你们班将开展以"An amazing outdoor activity"为
题的英语作文活动,并在班级内展示。请根据以下要求完成一篇文
章。要点如下：
注意:(1) 词数不少于80,开头已给出,不计入总词数;
(2) 内容必须包括思维导图中的要点,可以适当发挥,以使
短文完整、流畅；
(3) 文中不得提及真实的人名、校名等相关信息。
An amazing outdoor activity
Time flies by quickly. In the past year, I took part in many
amazing outdoor activities.
Last
summer, my classmates and I participated in an unforgettable school trip to the nearby mountains.
We spent the day exploring the hills, taking in fresh air and admiring different animals. We even
had a small picnic by a river, where we shared stories and laughter. When we reached the top of the hill,
we were rewarded with a view of the entire valley.
This activity was amazing because it gave us a chance to escape from noisy daily life and connect
with nature. It was also a great opportunity to communicate with our classmates and create good
memories. I felt energetic after the trip, and I was ready to face the challenges of the new school year
with my whole energy.
summer, my classmates and I participated in an unforgettable school trip to the nearby mountains.
We spent the day exploring the hills, taking in fresh air and admiring different animals. We even
had a small picnic by a river, where we shared stories and laughter. When we reached the top of the hill,
we were rewarded with a view of the entire valley.
This activity was amazing because it gave us a chance to escape from noisy daily life and connect
with nature. It was also a great opportunity to communicate with our classmates and create good
memories. I felt energetic after the trip, and I was ready to face the challenges of the new school year
with my whole energy.
答案
One possible version:
An amazing outdoor activity
Time flies by quickly. In the past year, I took part in many amazing outdoor activities. Last
summer, my classmates and I participated in an unforgettable school trip to the nearby mountains.
We spent the day exploring the hills, taking in fresh air and admiring different animals. We even
had a small picnic by a river, where we shared stories and laughter. When we reached the top of the hill,
we were rewarded with a view of the entire valley.
This activity was amazing because it gave us a chance to escape from noisy daily life and connect
with nature. It was also a great opportunity to communicate with our classmates and create good
memories. I felt energetic after the trip, and I was ready to face the challenges of the new school year
with my whole energy.
An amazing outdoor activity
Time flies by quickly. In the past year, I took part in many amazing outdoor activities. Last
summer, my classmates and I participated in an unforgettable school trip to the nearby mountains.
We spent the day exploring the hills, taking in fresh air and admiring different animals. We even
had a small picnic by a river, where we shared stories and laughter. When we reached the top of the hill,
we were rewarded with a view of the entire valley.
This activity was amazing because it gave us a chance to escape from noisy daily life and connect
with nature. It was also a great opportunity to communicate with our classmates and create good
memories. I felt energetic after the trip, and I was ready to face the challenges of the new school year
with my whole energy.
解析
【分析】
拿到这道书面表达题，首先要先梳理清楚所有要求：主题是介绍一次令人印象深刻的户外活动，思维导图明确给出了4个必须覆盖的核心要点：①活动的举办时间和地点；②你在活动中完成的具体事项；③这次活动令人惊叹的原因；④你参与活动后的真实感受。你可以选择贴近学生日常的常见户外活动场景，比如校园登山旅行、集体露营这类熟悉的内容，先承接题目给出的开头，先交代清楚活动的时间地点，再逐步展开活动过程的细节，之后解释活动的独特意义说明它出彩的原因，最后表达自己的真实感受，写作时注意全程以一般过去时为主，符合描述过去发生事件的语境，不要出现真实人名校名，保证词数超过80，适当添加细节让文章流畅自然。
【解析】
1. 审题定位：文体为叙事类记叙文，人称使用第一人称，核心时态为一般过去时，必须完整覆盖思维导图的全部4个要点，满足词数不少于80的要求，不要添加无关的冗余内容。
2. 结构搭建：
第一部分：承接题干给出的开头，直接点明本次户外活动的具体时间（去年夏天）和地点（近郊的山区），接着详细描述活动过程中的具体行为：探索山林、呼吸新鲜空气、观察不同的小动物、在河边野餐、登顶后俯瞰整个山谷的风景，把第二个要点“活动中做了什么”写得充实具体。
第二部分：先说明活动令人惊叹的原因：既可以逃离日常的喧闹亲近自然，也能增进和同学的交流、留下珍贵的美好回忆，覆盖第三个要点；最后写出自己的感受：旅行后充满活力，有充足的精力迎接新学年的挑战，覆盖最后一个要点。
3. 表达优化：使用地道的短语如participate in, take in fresh air, be rewarded with, connect with nature提升表达质感，添加合适的逻辑衔接词让行文连贯，规避基础语法错误。
【答案】
An amazing outdoor activity
Time flies by quickly. In the past year, I took part in many amazing outdoor activities. Last summer, my classmates and I participated in an unforgettable school trip to the nearby mountains. We spent the day exploring the hills, taking in fresh air and admiring different animals. We even had a small picnic by a river, where we shared stories and laughter. When we reached the top of the hill, we were rewarded with a view of the entire valley.
This activity was amazing because it gave us a chance to escape from noisy daily life and connect with nature. It was also a great opportunity to communicate with our classmates and create good memories. I felt energetic after the trip, and I was ready to face the challenges of the new school year with my whole energy.
【知识点】
英语记叙文写作，一般过去时运用，提纲作文要点覆盖
【点评】
本题属于贴近学生日常校园生活的话题作文，思维导图清晰列出了全部写作要点，大幅降低了审题门槛，学生只需要结合自身真实的户外活动经历补充合理细节，注意时态统一、要点齐全，就可以完成合格的作文，既考察了学生的英语叙事表达能力，也引导学生留意生活中的美好体验。
【难度系数】
0.6
拿到这道书面表达题，首先要先梳理清楚所有要求：主题是介绍一次令人印象深刻的户外活动，思维导图明确给出了4个必须覆盖的核心要点：①活动的举办时间和地点；②你在活动中完成的具体事项；③这次活动令人惊叹的原因；④你参与活动后的真实感受。你可以选择贴近学生日常的常见户外活动场景，比如校园登山旅行、集体露营这类熟悉的内容，先承接题目给出的开头，先交代清楚活动的时间地点，再逐步展开活动过程的细节，之后解释活动的独特意义说明它出彩的原因，最后表达自己的真实感受，写作时注意全程以一般过去时为主，符合描述过去发生事件的语境，不要出现真实人名校名，保证词数超过80，适当添加细节让文章流畅自然。
【解析】
1. 审题定位：文体为叙事类记叙文，人称使用第一人称，核心时态为一般过去时，必须完整覆盖思维导图的全部4个要点，满足词数不少于80的要求，不要添加无关的冗余内容。
2. 结构搭建：
第一部分：承接题干给出的开头，直接点明本次户外活动的具体时间（去年夏天）和地点（近郊的山区），接着详细描述活动过程中的具体行为：探索山林、呼吸新鲜空气、观察不同的小动物、在河边野餐、登顶后俯瞰整个山谷的风景，把第二个要点“活动中做了什么”写得充实具体。
第二部分：先说明活动令人惊叹的原因：既可以逃离日常的喧闹亲近自然，也能增进和同学的交流、留下珍贵的美好回忆，覆盖第三个要点；最后写出自己的感受：旅行后充满活力，有充足的精力迎接新学年的挑战，覆盖最后一个要点。
3. 表达优化：使用地道的短语如participate in, take in fresh air, be rewarded with, connect with nature提升表达质感，添加合适的逻辑衔接词让行文连贯，规避基础语法错误。
【答案】
An amazing outdoor activity
Time flies by quickly. In the past year, I took part in many amazing outdoor activities. Last summer, my classmates and I participated in an unforgettable school trip to the nearby mountains. We spent the day exploring the hills, taking in fresh air and admiring different animals. We even had a small picnic by a river, where we shared stories and laughter. When we reached the top of the hill, we were rewarded with a view of the entire valley.
This activity was amazing because it gave us a chance to escape from noisy daily life and connect with nature. It was also a great opportunity to communicate with our classmates and create good memories. I felt energetic after the trip, and I was ready to face the challenges of the new school year with my whole energy.
【知识点】
英语记叙文写作，一般过去时运用，提纲作文要点覆盖
【点评】
本题属于贴近学生日常校园生活的话题作文，思维导图清晰列出了全部写作要点，大幅降低了审题门槛，学生只需要结合自身真实的户外活动经历补充合理细节，注意时态统一、要点齐全，就可以完成合格的作文，既考察了学生的英语叙事表达能力，也引导学生留意生活中的美好体验。
【难度系数】
0.6
