十二、书面表达。(5分)
同学们,你们度过了一个幸福美好的小学时光,请总结一下自己六年来的变化和收获,以及给将来的自己提一些建议。请以“This is me”为题,写一篇短文。
要求:1. 必须包含思维导图中3~4个方面的要点,可适当发挥;
2. 时态准确,意思连贯,标点正确,书写规范;
3. 不少于5句话。(不包括已给出的句子)

This is me
How time flies! I have changed a lot!
Six years ago,
Now,
I have a lot of fun in my primary school, and I will try my best in the coming days.
同学们,你们度过了一个幸福美好的小学时光,请总结一下自己六年来的变化和收获,以及给将来的自己提一些建议。请以“This is me”为题,写一篇短文。
要求:1. 必须包含思维导图中3~4个方面的要点,可适当发挥;
2. 时态准确,意思连贯,标点正确,书写规范;
3. 不少于5句话。(不包括已给出的句子)
This is me
How time flies! I have changed a lot!
Six years ago,
Now,
I have a lot of fun in my primary school, and I will try my best in the coming days.
答案
One possible version:
This is me
How time flies! I have changed a lot!
Six years ago,I was short and thin. I
couldn't read or write well. I didn't like
playing sport. My favourite food was sweet
food. I often got up late. And I didn't have a
clear dream.
Now,I am tall and strong. I can read
easily and write very well. I like sport. I can
play football well. I like eating vegetables and
fruit. I get up early every day. At school,I
listen carefully to the teachers. At home,I
finish my homework on time. My dream is to
be an English teacher. I will study hard to
make my dream come true.
I have a lot of fun in my primary school,
and I will try my best in the coming days.
This is me
How time flies! I have changed a lot!
Six years ago,I was short and thin. I
couldn't read or write well. I didn't like
playing sport. My favourite food was sweet
food. I often got up late. And I didn't have a
clear dream.
Now,I am tall and strong. I can read
easily and write very well. I like sport. I can
play football well. I like eating vegetables and
fruit. I get up early every day. At school,I
listen carefully to the teachers. At home,I
finish my homework on time. My dream is to
be an English teacher. I will study hard to
make my dream come true.
I have a lot of fun in my primary school,
and I will try my best in the coming days.
解析
【分析】本题要求以“This is me”为题,总结小学六年的变化与收获,需结合思维导图中3-4个要点,分“过去(six years ago)”和“现在(now)”两个阶段描述,时态分别对应一般过去时和一般现在时,还要包含梦想相关内容,确保语句连贯、符合要求。解题时先梳理思维导图的核心要点:外表、能力、饮食、好习惯、梦想,选取3-4个方面,分别描述过去的状态和现在的变化,最后补充梦想与未来打算,满足不少于5句话的要求。
【解析】写作时,先沿用题目给出的开头,接着用一般过去时描述六年前的情况:如外表是short and thin,能力上couldn't read or write,饮食上偏爱sweet food,还有可能的小缺点如起床晚;再用一般现在时描述现在的变化:外表变为tall and strong,能力上能熟练读写,饮食上偏好vegetables和fruit,还有好习惯如在学校认真听讲、在家按时完成作业,最后点明梦想(如想成为英语老师)及未来会努力实现梦想,确保内容连贯、时态准确,符合字数要求。
【答案】One possible version:
This is me
How time flies! I have changed a lot!
Six years ago,I was short and thin. I couldn't read or write well. I didn't like playing sport. My favourite food was sweet food. I often got up late. And I didn't have a clear dream.
Now,I am tall and strong. I can read easily and write very well. I like sport. I can play football well. I like eating vegetables and fruit. I get up early every day. At school,I listen carefully to the teachers. At home,I finish my homework on time. My dream is to be an English teacher. I will study hard to make my dream come true.
I have a lot of fun in my primary school,and I will try my best in the coming days.
【知识点】一般过去时、一般现在时、书面表达
【点评】该范文紧扣题目要求,结合思维导图要点清晰对比了过去与现在的变化,时态运用准确,内容连贯充实,符合书面表达的各项规范。
【难度系数】0.5
【解析】写作时,先沿用题目给出的开头,接着用一般过去时描述六年前的情况:如外表是short and thin,能力上couldn't read or write,饮食上偏爱sweet food,还有可能的小缺点如起床晚;再用一般现在时描述现在的变化:外表变为tall and strong,能力上能熟练读写,饮食上偏好vegetables和fruit,还有好习惯如在学校认真听讲、在家按时完成作业,最后点明梦想(如想成为英语老师)及未来会努力实现梦想,确保内容连贯、时态准确,符合字数要求。
【答案】One possible version:
This is me
How time flies! I have changed a lot!
Six years ago,I was short and thin. I couldn't read or write well. I didn't like playing sport. My favourite food was sweet food. I often got up late. And I didn't have a clear dream.
Now,I am tall and strong. I can read easily and write very well. I like sport. I can play football well. I like eating vegetables and fruit. I get up early every day. At school,I listen carefully to the teachers. At home,I finish my homework on time. My dream is to be an English teacher. I will study hard to make my dream come true.
I have a lot of fun in my primary school,and I will try my best in the coming days.
【知识点】一般过去时、一般现在时、书面表达
【点评】该范文紧扣题目要求,结合思维导图要点清晰对比了过去与现在的变化,时态运用准确,内容连贯充实,符合书面表达的各项规范。
【难度系数】0.5
登录