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三、书面表达
我们的生活中处处充满着幸福,有父母的爱,有老师的爱,有同学的爱,有朋友的
爱.:…….请以“ Happiness around Me ”为题,写一篇英语短文。内容要点如下:
爱你的人 爱的表现
父母 为你做早餐;送你上学……
老师 照顾你;教你知识……
同学 一起学习;和睦相处;分享快乐与烦恼(worries)……
朋友 ……
要求:1.词数80左右;
2.短文须包含表格中的所有内容，可适当发挥。
Happiness around Me
我们的生活中处处充满着幸福,有父母的爱,有老师的爱,有同学的爱,有朋友的
爱.:…….请以“ Happiness around Me ”为题,写一篇英语短文。内容要点如下:
爱你的人 爱的表现
父母 为你做早餐;送你上学……
老师 照顾你;教你知识……
同学 一起学习;和睦相处;分享快乐与烦恼(worries)……
朋友 ……
要求:1.词数80左右;
2.短文须包含表格中的所有内容，可适当发挥。
Happiness around Me
There is lots of happiness around me in my everyday life. I receive happiness from my parents, my teachers, my classmates and my friends. In the morning, my mother cooks delicious food for me. My father drives me to school. At school the teachers not only look after me well but also teach me lots of useful knowledge. My classmates and I study together happily, getting on well with each other. I chat online with friends in my spare time. We often share our pleasure and worries. I often feel happy and excited when I get love from them. I make a decision to study hard and make great progress. Here, I should say to them,"Thank you for your love."
答案
One possible version:
Happiness around Me
There is lots of happiness around me in my
everyday life. I receive happiness from my parents,
my teachers, my classmates and my friends. In the
morning, my mother cooks delicious food for me.
My father drives me to school. At school the
teachers not only look after me well but also teach
me lots of useful knowledge. My classmates and I
study together happily, getting on well with each
other. I chat online with friends in my spare time.
We often share our pleasure and worries. I often
feel happy and excited when I get love from them. I
make a decision to study hard and make great
progress. Here, I should say to them,"Thank you
for your love."
Happiness around Me
There is lots of happiness around me in my
everyday life. I receive happiness from my parents,
my teachers, my classmates and my friends. In the
morning, my mother cooks delicious food for me.
My father drives me to school. At school the
teachers not only look after me well but also teach
me lots of useful knowledge. My classmates and I
study together happily, getting on well with each
other. I chat online with friends in my spare time.
We often share our pleasure and worries. I often
feel happy and excited when I get love from them. I
make a decision to study hard and make great
progress. Here, I should say to them,"Thank you
for your love."
解析
【分析】
首先进行审题，明确本次写作主题是“Happiness around Me（身边的幸福）”，体裁为记述类短文，核心时态用一般现在时，词数要求80左右，必须完整覆盖表格里父母、老师、同学三类人的所有爱的表现，还要补充朋友相关的合理内容。接下来梳理行文逻辑：第一步开篇总起，点明日常生活里自己身边处处充满来自不同人的幸福；第二步按照表格顺序，依次对应介绍不同角色给自己带来的关爱细节；最后收尾抒发自己的幸福感受与感恩，写作时注意把提示要点准确转化为通顺的英文，适当添加简单衔接词，控制词数符合要求即可。
【解析】
1. 开篇点题：总述日常生活中自己身边围绕着很多幸福，这些幸福来自父母、老师、同学和朋友，开门见山紧扣主题。
2. 逐一对应表格要点展开叙述：
① 对应父母的爱：描述早上妈妈做美味的早餐，爸爸开车送自己上学的日常细节；
② 对应老师的爱：说明在校期间老师不仅悉心照顾自己，还教授很多有用的知识；
③ 对应同学的爱：写明自己和同学们一起快乐学习，彼此和睦相处，共同分享快乐与烦恼；
④ 补充朋友的相关内容：描述空闲时间会和朋友聊天互动，彼此陪伴鼓励。
3. 结尾升华：表达收到这些爱意时自己十分开心，也下定决心努力学习，向所有给予自己爱的人表达感谢，整体行文流畅，没有语法错误，符合词数要求。
【答案】
One possible version:
Happiness around Me
There is lots of happiness around me in my everyday life. I receive happiness from my parents, my teachers, my classmates and my friends. In the morning, my mother cooks delicious food for me. My father drives me to school. At school the teachers not only look after me well but also teach me lots of useful knowledge. My classmates and I study together happily, getting on well with each other. I chat online with friends in my spare time. We often share our pleasure and worries. I often feel happy and excited when I get love from them. I make a decision to study hard and make great progress. Here, I should say to them,"Thank you for your love."
【知识点】
英语书面表达，一般现在时，要点整合
【点评】
本篇参考范文完整覆盖了题干给出的全部内容要点，行文逻辑清晰，从总述引入到分述不同身份的人给予的关爱，最后抒发自身的感恩之情，衔接自然，合理补充了朋友相关的细节内容，还用到了not only...but also...、get on well with等实用短语，语言流畅地道，完全符合词数要求，是非常规范的初中英语写作例文。同学们写作时可以先梳理所有要点避免遗漏，适当运用连接词提升行文流畅度。
【难度系数】
0.7
首先进行审题，明确本次写作主题是“Happiness around Me（身边的幸福）”，体裁为记述类短文，核心时态用一般现在时，词数要求80左右，必须完整覆盖表格里父母、老师、同学三类人的所有爱的表现，还要补充朋友相关的合理内容。接下来梳理行文逻辑：第一步开篇总起，点明日常生活里自己身边处处充满来自不同人的幸福；第二步按照表格顺序，依次对应介绍不同角色给自己带来的关爱细节；最后收尾抒发自己的幸福感受与感恩，写作时注意把提示要点准确转化为通顺的英文，适当添加简单衔接词，控制词数符合要求即可。
【解析】
1. 开篇点题：总述日常生活中自己身边围绕着很多幸福，这些幸福来自父母、老师、同学和朋友，开门见山紧扣主题。
2. 逐一对应表格要点展开叙述：
① 对应父母的爱：描述早上妈妈做美味的早餐，爸爸开车送自己上学的日常细节；
② 对应老师的爱：说明在校期间老师不仅悉心照顾自己，还教授很多有用的知识；
③ 对应同学的爱：写明自己和同学们一起快乐学习，彼此和睦相处，共同分享快乐与烦恼；
④ 补充朋友的相关内容：描述空闲时间会和朋友聊天互动，彼此陪伴鼓励。
3. 结尾升华：表达收到这些爱意时自己十分开心，也下定决心努力学习，向所有给予自己爱的人表达感谢，整体行文流畅，没有语法错误，符合词数要求。
【答案】
One possible version:
Happiness around Me
There is lots of happiness around me in my everyday life. I receive happiness from my parents, my teachers, my classmates and my friends. In the morning, my mother cooks delicious food for me. My father drives me to school. At school the teachers not only look after me well but also teach me lots of useful knowledge. My classmates and I study together happily, getting on well with each other. I chat online with friends in my spare time. We often share our pleasure and worries. I often feel happy and excited when I get love from them. I make a decision to study hard and make great progress. Here, I should say to them,"Thank you for your love."
【知识点】
英语书面表达，一般现在时，要点整合
【点评】
本篇参考范文完整覆盖了题干给出的全部内容要点，行文逻辑清晰，从总述引入到分述不同身份的人给予的关爱，最后抒发自身的感恩之情，衔接自然，合理补充了朋友相关的细节内容，还用到了not only...but also...、get on well with等实用短语，语言流畅地道，完全符合词数要求，是非常规范的初中英语写作例文。同学们写作时可以先梳理所有要点避免遗漏，适当运用连接词提升行文流畅度。
【难度系数】
0.7
